About 20 years ago, a conversation took place in my classroom. One of my students said,“Mrs. T, I know I am your favorite!” Another student quickly chimed in, “Noway! I am her favorite!” A third, fourth and then fifth student all began to make the same declaration. I had always told myself that I would not show favoritism to any one student, but at that moment, something clicked in my brain.  I needed to show favoritism to EVERY student. I needed to make each and every student feel like my favorite student.

The logical part of my brain kicked in and began to list all the reasons why this was the craziest idea I had ever had.  It was impossible.How could I conceivably do this? I had worked really hard to make sure I did not play favorites, now I was going to try to dote on each and every student?There just wasn’t enough time to accomplish this!

I walked away from the idea, but it kept finding its way back into my thoughts, niggling at me from time to time.  I decided to again employ the logical side of my brain and reason through how I might be able to do this.  Whenever I face a big problem, I usually just try to tackle it in smaller doses.  This helps me reach goals sooner and keeps me pushing on to the bigger goal.

 I decided I would just start with trying to get to know each student.  I know that sounds too easy, but when you have 20 or more students and you only see them 90 minutes two times a week, it can actually be challenging.

 I began to keep a list for myself that documented positive qualities that I saw in each student.  When I came to a student that I could not assign a quality to, I set out to get to know that student better. I started to pay attention to my quieter students and watch for shining moments. I began to look past some of the bigger personalities, to see the heart beating underneath the loud voice. This has further ignited my passion for teaching and has pushed me to deepen my relationship with each student.

This year has been a particularly challenging year for me.  I have one class with many behavior issues.  I have continued to put this into practice, even when I thought I could not think of one positive quality for several of my students. It was difficult to see past the inappropriate behavior exhibited day after day. I have pushed through. Although I have had many days where I have felt drained of all positive energy, I have made myself sit down and think of positive qualities for those “problem” students. It has not been easy, but I am happy to report that I am beginning to see fruit produced from this.

My students are beginning to realize that I care about them as a person.  I tell them all the time that I want to see them succeed in my class and that I believe that they can do it.

I will let you know a key part of this; you cannot get to know your students individually if your classroom is loud and chaotic all the time.  Getting to know each personality takes quieter moments.

So, I suppose this blog post actually has a misleading title.  I have not accomplished my big goal of making every student my favorite.  However, I am well on my way to making each student feel that they matter. It is not easy to do and there are some days my brain is overwhelmed just to teach the lesson and accomplish the lab without anyone getting hurt. (Remember, I am a Biology teacher and scalpels are present at various points throughout the year!) But I have made it a priority and keeping a physical list really helps.  It gives me a visual reminder of which students I am getting to know and which ones I need to concentrate on a little bit more.

We have about 3 weeks left before the end of our second quarter.  I have already looked at my list and realized there are still several students for which I need to assign a positive quality.I have set my mind to focus on looking for shining moments for these few.  After I get one positive quality, then I will move on to find two for each student. 

If you do something similar, I would love to hear from you!

Be encouraged, my fellow teachers, you are almost halfway through your year. Keep up the good work and stay diligent in the days leading up to Christmas break!